Four years ago today, Charlie and I were sitting in a government office in Guangzhou, China filing out piles of paperwork. A few minutes later, seven months of waiting, hoping and dreaming would end when we met a 4 year old girl named QiuQiu for the very first time. We had spent hours pouring over her pictures, wondering what, if anything, she knew about us and praying that we could figure out how to actually be parents. While signing the forms, I heard some giggling. I asked our guide what it was, and she told us it was our daughter. At that instant I looked up and saw a tiny black-haired girl in the doorway. Our eyes connected for just a second. In that instant, I became a mother, for the first time and forever.

Annie was a little scared when we first met her, but was quickly distracted by some rice crackers and the small toys we'd brought. She fell asleep in the van and all seemed peaceful. Then we made the mistake of waking her up when we arrived at the hotel. She instantly started screaming and wailing and didn't stop for hours. Luckily our guide, Kathy, was very experienced and helped us get her to the room. Kathy sat with us while Annie cried and cried for her nanny and for everything she'd ever known. She would not look at Charlie or I or allow us to feed her. She did manage to go through all the clothes we brought and laid claim to the Hello Kitty backpack.

Eventually she figured out there was a door to the room and tried to escape. She became so agitated we decided to let her go out of the roomwith us. She grabbed the backpack, marched out the door and thus began The Walk. The hallways of our hotel made a big square and the three of us walked around and around and around and around. Annie made it clear that I was supposed to walk next to her and Charlie a few paces behind. At first she carried her backpack, but soon passed it off to Charlie (though she glanced back often to make sure he still had it). At every corner she looked for her nanny. It was heart-breaking. She became so tired she could barely lift her feet but she was determined to continue. Finally, a couple of hours into The Walk, she gave in and laid down to sleep.

The next morning she was like a different child, happy and smiling and calling Charlie Baba. Calling me Mama took a few more days.

In the last four years, Annie has been through so many new experiences. She met her extended family at the airport with a shy smile and has become close to her cousins. She started preschool within a few weeks of coming home and has excelled in school ever since. She's had two surgeries to separate her fingers and remove banding from her leg. Her hair has grown to reach all the way down her back. She's grown more than a foot and gained almost 20 pounds. And she has returned to China twice, to become a big sister to Bethany and then Jack.

In some ways, Annie is a typical 8 year. She loves Hannah Montana and giggles with her best friends. She enjoys school but doesn't always want to go. Her favorite foods are Hot and Sour soup and mashed potatoes and gravy. She has a distinct fashion sense and will refuse to wear anything that is "not my style, Mom!!"
She is loving and affectionate to friends and family and, most of time, to her brother and sister. She's been known to be very sassy and extremely cranky especially when she is tired, but she consistently gets awards from school for her behavior. She has beautiful handwriting and does amazing graphic designs. She is incredibly bossy to her siblings and prefers it when they follow her every order. She stands up for the underdog and protects her little sister and brother. One of her favorite TV shows is "Clean House" but she leaves a trail of clothes and papers behind her at home. She learned how to swim this year and would do it every day if she could She loves to ride her bike and swing on the monkey bars. She loves Coat, her security blanket, protector against bad dreams and friend forever. She has definite opinions about most things and chose the colors and design for this slideshow.

But Annie's history will always be different from most American children. When she first came home, she was not at all interested in hearing or learning about China. In the last year she has begun to talk more about it and is thinking she might want to take Chinese lessons sometime soon. She has become more curious about her birth family and has started to ask some questions that we don't have the real answers for.

She knows absolutely that we are her forever family. She loves to curl up on my lap and talk about how she waited and waited for her forever Mommy and Daddy to find her and bring her home. We look at pictures of her in her orphanage, of the day we met her and dozens of photos taken over the last four years. In a few months, she will have lived here longer than she lived in China. I often think of her birth parents and how they must wonder where she is and how she is and if she is safe and happy. I wish somehow they could know what a brave, beautiful and amazing person she is and how well she is loved and will be loved forever.